Birth Day
February 18, 2007
Well guys, I’ve been remiss in not posting this up weeks ago. Technically, months ago actually. Wow.
So – here it is, the story of Nicky’s birth and all the drama that preceded it. As you can imagine, things didn’t quite go smoothly but they certainly did work out wonderfully. So here we go with a blow by blow summary.
Saturday, December 9th. Our original due date. The day started up well, ugly. It was cloudy and rainy and chilly – pretty much putting the kibosh on our original plan to walk around the downtown San Jose Christmas thing. In lieu of another outdoor event, I came up with the wise idea to drive around and we ended up stopping by Helimot leathers. That’s a local custom motorcycle suit place that I figured Mabel’s mother would get a kick out of the personalized samples on display (including suits that looks like a hockey outfit and another that is a replica of the CHP uniform). The fact that they also has small suits (not quite infant but still) was simply a coincidence of course.
We wandered around basically killing time until the afternoon. At this point, you may recall, the plan was to induce by the 14th if nothing happened before then. By that evening, nothing was happening so I figured I’d make some dinner and extra to start our food supplies for post-baby. We went to the market and I bought stuff to make pasta, intending to freeze half and have the rest for that night.
So there I am, simmering my (homemade) sauce and baking up two pans of a meat ziti ricotta thing when Mabel comes in with a stopwatch. She’d been having Braxton-Hicks contractions on and off for a couple of weeks (formerly known as “false labor”) but this was different. This was more pointed, more constant and certainly more painful. Hmm. Hmm indeed.
She was timing the waves of “fun”. They were about 8-9 minutes apart. No big deal, since the hospital wants 5-1-1 (5 mins apart for at least an hour and lasting at least a minute at a time). Thing is, they were consistently coming in at that 8-9 minute range which was a sign that things were quite likely on. Whoa.
We are a very tense dinner, with Mabel’s Mom trying to not show her concern. Part of that was helping with the dishwasher. Unfortunately we were out of the detergent. Even more unfortunate was her decision to try to use the regular stuff, resulting in a flood of foam that was quite similar to the one on our floor when Mabel also did the same thing. Genetics are a funny thing.
After a few hours of the contractions, Mabel was pretty much ready to head to the hospital. We called in and despite it appearing to be far too early, they were actually not busy and for us to come in. By now it’s about 1am and we’re wired, tired, anxious and excited. We get to the hospital and they hook Mabel up to monitoring. Contractions are coming, yep, but she’s not really dilated and they note that we have two options for pain management. One is a strong pain killer that they suggest for us to use and go home to “rest”. Neither Mabel or I are in any mood to sleep, so we opt for the weaker stuff that they are willing to provide in the hospital. That sounds goofy, I know, but their logic is that if they need to ramp up pain management they can’t start with the strong stuff. Whatever they gave her did about..zilch for the cramps. Not fun for Mabel. Unfortunately, her dilation doesn’t really progress much and by 6a none of the walking or positional stuff is doing very much to help. As it turns out, she was having “back labor” which is when the baby is spun around spine to spine with Mom, making progress difficult and painful. Ultimately we decided to go with an epidural and once it was in by 7:30a Mabel was in a FAR better state, pain-wise. It was a long night and we were all punchy – nobody slept a wink. Things were better, sort of, except the epidural has one side effect – it can slow down labor. At 10a and around 2-3cm of dilation, it appeared things were going to take a LONG time. Mabel suggested (heck, commanded practically) that I run out and get lunch for her Mom and I. Given the epidural, Mabel was on chips and sips (ice and water) so this was a MAJOR sweet gesture from the only one in our little team actually suffering. Says a lot about her, doesn’t it?
So…after consulting with the nurses and hearing that we have hours ahead of us, I reluctantly leave to run three errands: (1) to grab the phone charger from the office, (2) to grab my work laptop from the house and (3) to grab lunch. Why the work laptop of all things? Well, I had specifically told people *not* to call us, as I would be posting updates on our site. I had confirmed – the hospital had wireless Internet service (free too!) for patients. Perfect. Problem is, for reasons nobody ever really explained the .mac node was blocked, as was Yahoo, as were a bunch of other common sites. So – I could not even check out website, let alone update it. I figured the work system and VPN would be a work around (no, as it turned out) but worth a shot. Since that was an unknown option, I needed the phone charger since my cell was about to run out. Whee. The lunch part was easy, just grab some fast food and go. Fine.
So step 1 – the office. I grab the charger and post the quick update. Call the hospital and she’s now at 4cm, but all is ok. Hmm…alrighty, but eeek. I zip home (about ten miles) and grab the laptop. I get back to the car and this is what I’m told “she’s at 10cm and zero station”. That means, simply, she’s ready. Like NOW. Mind you, at that point I’m as far away as I’m going to be from the hospital. Mabel, in her infinitely kind way, says “it’s ok – the doctor is not here and you have time – get lunch and drive safely back here”. I make the fastest Burger King run ever and then proceed to catch every stinking red light possible.
I kid you not. Of out however many intersections there are in that distance, I must have hit 75% of the red lights. I’m even on the main road, not some little side street. Argh!!!
At any rate, I get there in time. I wash up and get as ready as possible. As an extra added bonus, the epidural had worn off. Yes, worn off. Did you know this was possible? I didn’t. Mabel didn’t…but it did. Instead of blissful numbness, she was feeling it and it was not fun. As Nicky has been told before – his Mom is tougher than anyone can imagine and no matter what happens to me I’ll never again be able to tell her I know what pain is.
Here we go – delivery. The doctor comes in and is entirely calm and professional. Mabel’s Mom and I are trying to appear calm. I’m telling Mabel how great she’s doing and to focus, but to be honest I don’t entirely believe it. I’m thinking this is going to take forever and the pain is going to be really bad and I can’t do a thing to help her. It’s a pretty lousy feeling knowing someone you love is hurting and all you can do it talk to them.
The doctor is being positive and I figure it’s cheerleading – but then I see the head. I SEE him. There’s no way to prepare for that – it’s just amazing. Then I see his head coming out – hair, curvature – it’s his HEAD and it’s right there! Then, like a fast-forward, it’s his entire head, then shoulders, then his little chest and ZIP he’s here and crying like a champ. There are no words to express the feeling. Our child, here safe and sound and his crying like music. We had been talking to Zy for months, kidding about him and planning for his arrival. He was here and it felt just natural. Like he was always here, in the abstract, and now he was just here in person. To be honest I think we were more worried about the idea of having a child than we’ve been with the reality. He’s here, healthy and safe and it was worth it.
Not easy, by any means, but worth it. 12:57p December 10, 2006. Welcome Nicky.